Thank you, for trying to make my life better and ended my pitiful existence as a single girl. Thank you for trying to find mister wonderful and dumping him in my lap (shouldn't it be the other way around?) Thank you for deciding what I cannot decide for myself.
Recently everyone I know has been pushing for me to date a certain someone in my singles' group.
"Tegan, you know who you should ask on a date?"(No, but I bet you're gonna tell me) "Oh Tegan, you would be such a cute couple!"(O, you think so?) "Tegan, I know the perfect man for you!" (Really,... really) NO, you DON'T. You know one of the few eligible bachelors in Kingman. There are roughly 8. Yes, he is cute, yes, he is a nice guy, yes, we did go on a few dates a couple years back. NO I am not interested and NO I don't think he is the perfect man for me. THANK YOU very much.
And why do I have to be the one to do the asking? (You asked)
I'll tell you why, because he is too shy to ask me himself, or he tries to get me to do something and then never mentions it again, or his friend sets us up and he cancels at the last minute and his friend has to be the one to tell me. That is the kind of guys people want to set me up with. Seriously, phrase I hear constantly "he doesn't go on very many dates." or "He's a little shy around girls..." Then WHY for the love of salt and vinegar chips am I a good match for him? What does that say about ME?
I don't want to wear the pants in the relationship, thank you very much.
So, I know you are only trying to help me, but please, if I want to date someone that I see on a regular basis, I will do so. I've done it before. I know you love me and only want my best interest, but please, if I know him better than you do, do not try to set me up with him. Stop being a goey chocolate cookie, or this crevice in my arm, or an old sponge with hair on it. I love you, don't change that.